Punderful Day
by Thesparklingnoodles
Summary: Who doesn't like puns? (A short Lapidot one-shot.)


**A/N: Hey guys! This is a short little one-shot with a ton of bad puns, and a bit of Lapidot fluff at the end! I hope you all enjoy!**

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 _Wham!_ One of the two girls that had been walking, hand in hand, ran right into a tree. While the girl was rubbing her face, her companion was having a fit of bubbly laughter.

"Peri, are you… _oaky_?" the taller of the two managed to ask between giggles.

"Oh my stars, Lapis. No puns!" the blonde complained. It was no use; the bluenette had a gleeful grin plastered all over her face.

"What? I feel like I need to _spruce_ up my abilities. They've been lacking lately," came the response.

"I'm just going to ignore you," Peridot grumbled.

"I can't be- _leaf_ you would do that!" Lapis exclaimed.

Girl threw her hands up in the air as a response. "Such a dumb _ash."_

Lapis' grin grew at the pun that her partner just cracked. "You're barking up the wrong tree if you want to trade puns, you know?"

" _I_ know? No, Lapis, _yew_ should know that I can take you any day of the week!" Peridot retorted, turning to the taller woman.

"Wow, I _wooden_ have thought that you'd be up to such a challenge," Lapis responded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You know what? You _axed_ for it," the blonde said, trying to seem intimidating.

Peridot's attempt had failed and Lapis was sent into another fit of laughter. After the bout of chuckling subsided, the pun war continued.

"I'll have you know, I'm _knot_ going to be beat," came Lapis' response.

Peridot pretended to think for a moment. When she focused back on the blue-haired girl, she was met with a raised eyebrow.

"You may be right… I'm _stumped,_ " Peridot replied, smirking and raising her arms in a shrug.

"You know what, Peri? If you beat me, I'll buy you _acacia*_ wine."

"Whatever _fir?_ This isn't much of a competition at all!"

"You're right. Heck, you _maple_ this one off!" Lapis said, hinting at all of the other pun-offs that Peridot had lost.

Peridot caught onto what Lapis was saying and sighed. "I'm going out on a _limb_ here, but I have to agree with you! I may just win this, as long as I don't get _board_ with it."

There was a flash of surprise in Lapis' eyes. "A double pun? I never would have thought you'd _branch_ out like that! Hopefully you'll do that again in the _fuschia,_ but it would be impressive if you pulled off _tree_ at once."

"Speaking of the future, we should go to the _beech_ sometime," Peridot replied, hoping to catch Lapis off-guard.

Lapis was too smart to be thrown by the change in subject though, and smiled. "You know what? If we do, I _willow_ you one!"

The blonde groaned and tossed her hands up, exaggerating her frustration. "I told you about this, you're _pine._ You won't owe me anything!"

"You're right, I guess. Anyways, if we do go to the beach, aren't you going to need some swim _trunks?_ "

The pair had attracted a few sets of staring eyes and chuckling onlookers. Peridot was the first to notice and made use of the distraction.

"Yes, I do. Why do you ask? Actually, nevermind. We've become slightly _poplar_ recently," she said.

Lapis blinked and looked around. "Wow! I haven't had this much attention since elemen _tree_!"

Peridot stifled a laugh. "Okay, that one was good. However, I'm pati _ent_ enough to run you out of ideas," the blonde replied.

A curious look crept into Lapis' eyes. "Well, we can't stay here forever. The _copse_ would end up getting called sooner or later."

"Hm. I suppose you're right. That would be slightly over- _elming_ and completely unwelcome."

"Hey, they might even get us for _tree_ son! You can never tell!"

"Okay Lapis. That was _acorn_ -y one, and a far stretch," Peridot snorted.

"Well, I suppose it was better than a _sappy_ pun," came the response.

"I would say that you were just _pining_ for my attention."

"Why would I do that? I mean, sure. It would be a _treet_ , but I already have it," the bluenette replied.

"Whatever. I still _fernley_ believe what I said," Peridot said, making a gesture in the air.

"Well, I guess everyone has an o _pine_ on," Lapis said, smiling at her partner. She was impressed; Peridot usually never lasted this long.

"Well, thank you for respecting my opinions, even if you are disa _green_ with me."

For once, Lapis was at a loss of words. "Well, Peridot, I don't have _mulch_ to say anymore," she said shrugging.

"Darn, this was starting to _grow_ on me!" Peridot said, feigning disappointment.

"You know what? I'm impressed you've decided to _stick_ with this! However, I think it's time to head home," Lapis replied, grasping at straws.

"Well, I have to say that sounds like a great idea! I don't have much more to con _tree_ bute anymore," the blonde responded.

The bluenette opened her mouth, yet closed it again. A grin started to creep across Peridot's face.

"I've got to say, you've stripped me down to my _roots_ , sweetie. I don't have any more to give," Lapis sighed.

Peridot's grin faded, and she let her arms drop to her sides. "You know what Lapis? There isn't _mushroom_ for more to say, except that this was fun," the blonde said.

Lapis laughed and threw her arms around the shorter girl, drawing her into a hug. "I'm impressed, Peri. You finally got the last pun in!"

The two burst into laughter and held the embrace for a few moments.

"So, what do I get as a reward?" Peridot asked, teasingly.

"Oh, nothing," Lapis answered, but not before she gave Peridot a quick kiss.

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 **A/N: So I told myself time and time again not to write a story when I'm writing another one, but I couldn't get this out of my head! If you have any ideas for a prompt, go ahead and let me know either via PMing me on here, or sending me an ask or message on Tumblr (url is the same as my username on here)! Anyways, thanks for reading this little story, and I hoped you enjoyed it! Have a wonderful night/day!**

 ***I know this isn't the proper pronunciation, but read it as a-kay-shuh or something close to the sound of "a case of."**


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